I’m Sorry Ashley

Posted by Aaron Watters - October 9, 2008 - Uncategorized - No Comments

So, I had a “facebook fling” with one of my friends at college, we thought it would be funny and harmless to just change our relationship status…I’m an idiot. Anyway, posted below is my “breakup” letter.


Dearest Ashley,

Please understand that as I write this note my heart is breaking in to pieces, plummeting to the floor, and being trampled by a mass rush of Spainards running with the bulls. After being trampled, the thousands of pieces left of my heart will be splattered on the asphalt, street, pavement or dirt road, and may only be picked up by time. You see Ashley…you had me at “New Friend Request” yet still i’m fighting to get to your inbox.

I can’t do this anymore, pretending like I’m good enough for you. Ashley you are like a bronzed goddess, and I am a sad buddha. How can the two be together? This is no tale of Beauty and the Beast, there is no happy ending for me here. You deserve the best, and that, just isn’t me. I know that you “settled” for me when we got together, but you deserve so much more than settling, you should find that knight in shining armor galloping across the country on a fierce steed, leave me be..I am but a peasant begging at the corner of 7th and Not Good Enough Street.

Do me one favor, as you live out the rest of your bright shiny days know that for a time you made my rain clouds disappear. You drove back the storms of my depression, for that, I can never repay you. Please forgive me for this, but I’m afraid that we can no longer be together. Like a dam holds back water, I am also holding you back from being free. I feel that it is time for me to open the flood gates and let you go, be free Ms. Nelson, be free.

Forget about me…

With Facebook Love,
-The Aaron Watters

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